Wisdom from Kate Cousens – Leadership Mindset Mentor
At school, I was terrible at sports, so no one picked me to be on their team. In fact, I remember once two team captains arguing over who was going to have me on their netball side. It was because I was so terrible that neither of them wanted me! I know that many of you reading will have had similar experiences. One of the biggest takeaway messages in my book ‘Don’t Dim to Fit In’ is that you don’t need to wait to be picked. Whether it is in your career, business, or in life generally – you can choose yourself.
The Time is Right
We live in an extraordinary time where you can quite literally do, be, and have anything if you set your mind to it. At the Vancouver Peace Summit in 2010, the Dalai Lama said that ‘the world will be saved by the Western woman.’ And with our economic and reproductive freedom, many of us Western women are in the privileged position that we can have careers, choose our own destinies and use our influence to positively help the world to become a better place for everyone. The question is, are we doing everything we can? Or are we, in fact, holding ourselves back?
I know I am privileged well beyond most people on this planet. I feel strongly that I should be using this privilege in some way to help others. But I see so many other women like me culturally programmed to feel that we are not enough.
We are programmed to fit in and behave a certain way to get ahead in our careers and life generally. If we don’t conform to societal norms we are deemed ‘too much’ and beat ourselves up with guilt, shame, and embarrassment. This conditioning can hold us back from fulfilling our potential.
It’s Time to Stop Dimming to Fit in and Learn to Live Life With a Leadership Mindset
Don’t Dim to Fit In is a book of self-discovery which will help you to learn how to push through your self-limiting beliefs, mindset blocks, and common forms of self-sabotage that can block your success. It is my intention to motivate and inspire readers through my down-to-earth, friendly, and accessible advice; sharing my ‘lightbulb moments’ and helping to remind you that you already have everything inside of you to be able to achieve your ambitions, whatever they may be. I have filled it with my personal experiences, stories, and a broad range of practical tools and techniques that I personally used to overcome my own adversities, which I vulnerably share with readers.
After working with hundreds of women for over 20 years, I understand that mindset work is layered. Just when you believe you have resolved and conquered your self-limiting beliefs, another one arises and holds you back. I liken it to the layers of an onion, and just like an onion those beliefs can stink and make you cry! The fact is that we are all a work in progress, all of the time!
Reflect on the Future…
Imagine your future self for a moment. You know, that amazing, happy, successful version of you that exists 5, 10, 15 years from now. In the book, I remind you that the things you do today, tomorrow, this week, month and year are the things that are going to help you get closer to that version of yourself. The trouble is that we are doing lots of things that actually get in the way of us taking action on things that would get us closer to our true desires.
We make excuses to ourselves such as claiming we are too busy, lacking adequate time/money/energy, and delaying the start of our endeavours until the following week/month/year. I’m not saying you’re not busy. We are all juggling a million and one things. But are we really too busy for even the teeniest, tiniest baby steps we could take today that would help us to move closer towards what we want?
I know that there are many of you who are hiding behind these excuses because you are really afraid. And I know that because I have been there and got the t-shirt! We are afraid of being visible and putting ourselves ‘out there’ too much. We’re afraid of getting out of our comfort zones and of putting our heads above the parapet and shining. It’s easier for us to stay playing small, to stay in the shadows, to keep dimming our light so that we fit in. It’s time to stop that from happening!
Actions to Take Today
Don’t Dim to Fit In is a handbook which gives you the tools, knowledge, and confidence you need to stand out and shine exactly as you are, to help you reach your highest potential. In it I share ways you can:
- Make peace with your past and understand that this context does not dictate your future success.
- Embrace your feelings and start to heal any pain you’ve experienced that could be holding you back.
- Manage your mindset so that you can approach whatever life throws at you with inner strength.
- See that sometimes it is the fear of success that scares you the most. Moreover, it will help you to work through concerns such as judgment from others.
- Get comfortable with change and learn ways to be more resilient.
- Work out what you really, really want from your life and how to take action towards getting there.
- Forgive and let go of things that you can’t change. This way you can live with more inner peace and acceptance.
- See that you are the CEO of your own life and explore the relationships you have with people around you.
Ultimately, you will uncover that inner confidence that is already inside of you so that you can reach your highest potential. Because it’s your time, and you’re ready to shine!
You can get your copy of Don’t Dim to Fit In on Amazon: A guide for exceptional women to live life with a leadership mindset. You can find out more about Kate at www.katecousens.com or connect with her on social media.
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